Thursday, January 6, 2011

Granny's 2011 orders warn world leaders of the woodshed

To:  Barack Obama, Nicholas Sarkozy, Vladmir Putin, Kim II Sung,Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
From:  Your Granny, Pokesalad
Woodshed where leaders get scoldings or whippin's when they been bad
It's 2011 now fellers, and here's what Granny says you better do, and don't give me no back talk since you got a world to save.   I'm givin' you this first in your languages, but doin' the rest in English cause I don't want to have to say this more than once.

C'est des Nouveaux ans fellers et voici que la Mamie dit que vous faites mieux, écoutez ainsi en haut nous ne faisons pas plus d'impertinence non plus, quand vous avez reçu un monde pour sauver.  Je suis givin' vous cette annonce dans vos langues, mais vous faites mieux l'attention, puisque je suis doin' le reste dans la cause anglaise je ne veux pas devoir dire celui-ci plus de temps.

그것은 연말 연시를 친구들하고 여기에 할머니는 당신을 더 당신이 더 잘 들어 저장할 세계를 들어온 이후로 내게 어떤 말대꾸를 제공하지 않도록, 그렇게 말하는거야. 저장합니다.  내가 주지도예요 '귀하의 언어로이 발표,하지만 난 최선을 때죠 당신은 더 나은, 주목'난이 두 번 이상 말할 필요하고 싶지 않아 영어 원인에있는 나머지는.

Это - после лесорубов Новых годов, и вот - то, какая Бабуля говорит, что Вы лучше делаете, таким образом Вы лучше слушаете и не даете мне никакого дерзкого ответа, с тех пор как Вы заставили мир cэкономить. Я - givin' Вы это сначала на ваших языках, но Вы лучше обращаете внимание, так как я - doin' остальные в английской причине, я не хочу должны сказать это не раз.

نه بعد سنوات قاطعو جديد ، وهنا ما الجدة يقول لك ما هو أفضل ، لذلك كنت أفضل الاستماع ولا تعطيني أي حديث للوراء منذ حصلت على العالم ليخلص. ابن غيفين 'لكم هذا أول ألسنتكم ، ولكن عليك دفع أفضل اهتمام ، وأنا منذ تفعلين الباقي في قضية اللغة الإنجليزية وأنا لا أريد أن أقول لهذا أكثر من مرة.

Last year you fellers made mistakes.  I don't have to tell you again.  But Barry you gotta listen better and Nicholas you do the same.  Vladmir, you get downright mean sometimes, and that just will not do.  As for you, Kim, you better lighten up a lot cause threatenin' your brothers and sisters, well that's a real bad thing.

And Mahmoud, you know Granny's Farsi isn't very good and besides there are enough letters and words you folks know from Arabic, I'm sure you'll understand.  You lie, you threaten, and you think it's all a joke.  But Granny's watchin' you real close, and that woodshed isn't so far that I can't catch you and get you in it, unless my 'gator in my yard reaches out and grabs you first.

The message to all you fellers is simply this again, since every year it seems the whole thing just goes on and on.  If you don't do what Granny says, and mind your P's and Q's, we're in for real bad trouble.  Then there won't be a bayou near Cloutierville big enough for the likes of you, so we'll just carve one specially out and put you in the mud way deep down with the snakes where you belong if you don't mind your Granny.

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